A weekly movie podcast hosted by stand up comedians Ryan Cullen and Mark Nelson. Join them as they pick apart their film of the week. They might discuss movies, they might not, it’ll be a laugh anyway. Argumentative, unqualified and very very funny. Cullen and Nelson are Absolute Cuts.
…
continue reading
Dj Sets from a Toronto-based DJ and production outfit deeply rooted in deep and soulful house music.
…
continue reading
The Seánpod, hosted by Comedian Seán Cullen, is a feast of rambling silliness punctuated by music, special guests and Seán's Impromptu Radio Theatre. Those who loved CBC's Simply Seán, or the Seán Schau will revel in this podcast.
…
continue reading
Two 8th grade students who like to ask guests, "Would you rathers!" Cover art photo provided by JJ Ying on Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/@jjying
…
continue reading
Cullen and Jordan review 7th Heaven: The Podcast is a podcast wherein Cullen and Jordan review 7th heaven: the podcast. Wait, what? Neither of these boys have seen an episode of 7th heaven in their lives. Why do they watch it? They're not sure. Most likely, it's because Cullen is in Canada and Jordan is in Washington and they need to talk about something. Contact: seventhheavenpodcast@gmail.com
…
continue reading
Learn English with Cullen Winner of The Australian Podcast Awards Castaway most popular vote category in Lifestyle, Health and Wellness. Download the app for lessons one to five. http://bit.ly/EnglishLesson1 Listen carefully to lessons one to five as we arrive in a new country. Here are a few of the ideas we use to help you in this lesson one to five for beginners. Download the app on http://eattmag.com/ to assist you after you have heard the recording once. What kind of questions are we goi ...
…
continue reading
"What's wrong Dillon, CIA got you pushing too many pencils" Episode 54 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the greased muscling, testosterone spunking, Arnie quipping classic Predator. Mark and Ryan talk about Bond girls, which British celebrity would play the Predator and why this might be the greatest film ever made. P…
…
continue reading
"I see dead people" Episode 53 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the Donnie Wahlberging , twisty turning, cheese dicking classic The Sixth Sense. Mark and Ryan talk about the Fringe, invent the game Cum Ball, and discuss what ghosts can actually do. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what gue…
…
continue reading
"My Father saw me play Fulham" Episode 52 of Absolute Cuts is the second of our Euros specials. This week's episode sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the globe trotting, Geordie stereotyping, Zinedine Zidaneing bin fire, Goal. Mark and Ryan talk about the Euros, racist Mexicans and why none of this film would every happen. Please get i…
…
continue reading
"This frigging game is ruining my life" Episode 51 of Absolute Cuts is the first of our Euros specials. This week's episode sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the arm breaking, Victoire chanting, overhead kicking classic Escape To Victory. Mark and Ryan talk about Glastonbury, Pele talking like Borat and the sheer pointlessness of life.…
…
continue reading
"If there's one thing the last week has taught me, it's better to have a gun and not need it than need a gun and not have it." Episode 50 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the roller coasting, call girling, coming home in a body bagging classic True Romance. Mark and Ryan talk about the Euros, Cillit Bang and shagging …
…
continue reading
"I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet. But your kids are gonna love it." Episode 49 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1985 time travelling, flux capaciting, 1.21 gigawatting classic Back To The Future. Mark and Ryan talk about Cullen's tumour, Nelson's hair and how hot your younger Mum would have to be before…
…
continue reading
"I like these calm little moments before the storm." Episode 48 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1994 family slaying, contract killing, inappropriate sleepovering classic Leon The Professional. Mark and Ryan talk about how easy it would be to kill a pensioner, drinking milk in a car and why this film is just Luc B…
…
continue reading
"Lawrence of my labia" Episode 47 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2010 camel riding, gay weddinging, hot nanny obsessing, desert storm of shit Sex And The City 2. Mark and Ryan talk about rainy music festivals, selling a house and how this film manages to be simultaneously racist, sexist, classist, homophobic and…
…
continue reading
"I always was a sucker for a redhead." Episode 46 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2000 Porsche jacking, Ferrari boosting, low-riding classic, Gone In 60 Seconds. Mark and Ryan talk about what they would do for £27 million, lawnmowers and why no one in this film is good at their job. Please get in touch and let us…
…
continue reading
"I put a bird on my head." Episode 45 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2008 altar jilting, closet building, Vivienne Westwooding, binfire Sex And The City. Mark and Ryan talk about Eurovision, why not one character in this horrific film is likeable at all and Cullen reads Nelson some of James Joyce's love letters.…
…
continue reading
"Pain does not exist in this dojo, does it?" Episode 44 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1984, leg weeping, body bag getting, wax on/wax offing classic The Karate Kid. Mark and Ryan talk about the bald men meeting up, Nelson becoming an ice bath guy and Cullen's theory on how Miyagi made his money. Please get in t…
…
continue reading
"You're an inanimate f**cking object" Episode 43 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2008, sight-seeing, Canadian punching, alcove dwelling classic In Bruges. Mark and Ryan talk about the Irish, Belgium and how to survive a tsunami. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like …
…
continue reading
"GET OFF MY PLANE" Episode 42 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1997, plane hijacking, Harrison Fording, shite CGI-ing classic Air Force One. Mark and Ryan talk about balaclavas, Cullen trying to organise a game of 5's and what cool things Air Force One actually has? Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy…
…
continue reading
"Not at the table Carlos" Episode 41 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2009, teeth pulling, tiger stealing, hooker marrying classic The Hangover. Mark and Ryan talk about Lady Gaga, treating a cut thumb and of course, VEGAS BABY. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like t…
…
continue reading
"Sometime I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion." Episode 40 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2001, world saving, portal opening, 6ft rabbiting classic Donnie Darko. Mark and Ryan talk about Cullen getting a cat, teenage angst and why you are a bellend if you have an expensive bike. Please get in touch and let…
…
continue reading
"Gentlemen, let's broaden our minds." Episode 39 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1989, caped crusading, rhubarb rubbing, pale moonlight dancing classic Batman. Mark and Ryan talk about horny Joker, the Bat Cock and take smelling salts during the record. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast…
…
continue reading
"People look at me and see my brother." Episode 38 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1999, kerb stomping, flag waving, shower assaulting classic American History X. Mark and Ryan talk about the Oscars, Edward Furlong and how many books Hitler wrote. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what…
…
continue reading
"Those damn Gideons" Episode 37 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1996, mask wearing, disavowing, NOC list stealing classic Mission Impossible. Mark and Ryan talk about peanuts, old email addresses and the worst thing you could steal from the CIA. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what g…
…
continue reading
"I'd suck a fart out her asshole and hold it like a bong hit" Episode 36 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2007, frisbee throwing, breast showing, penguin's ass eating shitshow Good Luck Chuck. Mark and Ryan talk about Cullen being in Australia, red pandas and they struggle to convey how truly truly awful this film…
…
continue reading
"Requesting permission to shake the hand of the daughter of the bravest man I've ever met" Episode 35 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1998, oil drilling, astronaut training, don't wanna miss a thinging classic Armageddon, Mark and Ryan talk about accidental racism, animal crackers in pubic hair and how mental a b…
…
continue reading
"Wilsonnnnnnnnn" Episode 34 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2000, parcel delivering, fire starting, raft building classic Castaway, Mark and Ryan talk about buying a gun, cursed hats and how long it would take us to shag a volleyball. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd…
…
continue reading
"If you're a bird then I'm a bird" Episode 33 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2004, emotionally manipulating, care home dying, too many birding film The Notebook. Mark and Ryan talk about Tenerife, Skegness and whether Henry Cavill is better looking than Ryan Gosling. Please get in touch and let us know if you en…
…
continue reading
"Either we heal as a team, or we’re going to crumble, inch by inch, play by play, til we’re finished." Episode 32 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1999, quarterbacking, tight ending', inch by inching classic Any Given Sunday. Mark and Ryan talk about Cullen being hit by cars, dodgy NFL team names and Willie, Willi…
…
continue reading
"I have been offered a lot for my work but never everything" Episode 31 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1960, gunslingin', bandit chasin', village savin' The Magnificent Seven. Mark and Ryan talk Nelson's latest injury, cowboy names and Cullen's taxes\. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast…
…
continue reading
"You're my boy Blue" Episode 30 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2003, going streaking, tranquiliser darting, earmuffing classic Old School. Mark and Ryan talk fraternities, rider demands and argue a lot about Saltburn. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see on …
…
continue reading
"Can you fly Bobby?" Episode 29 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1987, gun twirling, toxic wasting, dollar buying classic Robocop. Mark and Ryan talk about the Epstein List, what they got up to over Christmas, and why Murphy dying is all his partner's fault. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the pod…
…
continue reading
"I love that word, 'relationship.' Covers all manner of sins, doesn't it?" Episode 28 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2003, spouse betraying, sex obsessed, fat shaming, Christmas classic Love Actually. Mark and Ryan talk about every single thing that is wrong with this absolute bin fire of a film. (Mark actually …
…
continue reading
"Attaboy Clarence" Episode 27 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1946, moon lassoing, wings achieving, Christmas classic, It's A Wonderful Life. Mark and Ryan talk about Christmas gigs, competitive drinking and why life would be better if Ryan had never been born. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the…
…
continue reading
“Let the kids know that from now on, it's El Padre” Episode 25 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2017, Bono singing, telephone pole cutting, Christmas classic, Daddy's Home 2. Mark and Ryan talk about auditions, whether you should say "I love You" to your family, and why John Cena does so much charity work. Please …
…
continue reading
“Keep the change, ya filthy animal.” Episode 25 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1990, child abandoning, burglar torturing, Christmas classic Home Alone. Mark and Ryan talk about jumpers, Ryan's first job, and Mark offers up some wild theories about the McAllister family. Please get in touch and let us know if you…
…
continue reading
“When I was a kid, we were so poor that the roaches was on welfare.” Episode 24 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2001, Apollo playing, body inhabiting, comedy classic Down To Earth. Mark and Ryan talk about meeting Stifler’s Mom, John Lewis ads, and where they stand in the pecking order of comedy. Please get in to…
…
continue reading
“Hey, you guys” Episode 23 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1985 treasure hunting, truffle shuffling, adventure classic The Goonies. Mark and Ryan talk about inhaler sex, how to pronounce words, and what exactly happened to Sloth. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like…
…
continue reading
“As far back as I can remember I always wanted to be a gangster” Episode 22 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1990 shoe shine box getting, garlic slicing, gangster epic Goodfellas. Mark and Ryan talk about Nelson's hatred of people on Instagram, Kit Kats, and whether we could be made men" Please get in touch and le…
…
continue reading
“Your mother’s ass is so hairy…it looks like Don King’s about to pop out and say, “Only in America!” Episode 21 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2004 prosthetic, race fest, White Chicks. Mark and Ryan talk about celebrities dying, Terry Crews and some real tough Would You Rather questions. Please get in touch and …
…
continue reading
"Hail Paimon" Episode 20 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2018 grief stricken head spinner, Hereditary, in the second of the Halloween Specials. Mark and Ryan talk about Halloween costumes, seances and the 7 Kings of Hell. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see …
…
continue reading
"It's all for you" Episode 19 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1976 demonic child horror classic, The Omen, in the first of the Halloween Specials. Mark and Ryan talk about first class flying, looking at your arse in the mirror and Cullen's weird dream. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast,…
…
continue reading
"I can't believe I married a leprechaun" Episode 18 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2007 mentally manipulative rom com PS I Love You. Mark and Ryan talk about Belgium, the worst lap dances and how racist this film is towards the Irish. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'…
…
continue reading
"Can't have a bunch of old pregnant bitches running around. That's crazy" Episode 17 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2007 accidental pregnancy comedy Knocked Up. Mark and Ryan talk about biscuits, condoms and Cullen's wild Catholic Church theory. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what …
…
continue reading
"ヒロキさん、本当にかっこいいですね" Episode 15 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2000 classroom beat em up film Battle Royale. Mark and Ryan talk about massive balls, the good old days of Limewire and which one of them would be killed first. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to se…
…
continue reading
"I'm drunk right now" Episode 15 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2012 piss head redemption film Flight. Mark and Ryan talk about Eugene attending a Jazz festival, drunken escapades and Cullen's hatred of various actors. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see on…
…
continue reading
"Carter, you dick" Episode 14 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2000 inventive teen death, supernatural film Final Destination. Mark and Ryan talk about drinking sausage juice, Ashton Kutcher and Jihadis v WWE wrestlers. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see on …
…
continue reading
"Can everyone please stop getting shot?" Episode 13 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1998 cockney gangster classic Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels. Mark and Ryan talk about Vinnie Jones, cockney rhyming slang and what their criminal nicknames would be. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast…
…
continue reading
"Bag of sand?" Episode 12 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2005 deflowering comedy The 40 Year Old Virgin. Mark and Ryan talk about Cullen being called ugly, how they lost their virginities and whether Nikola Tesla was a shagger. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like …
…
continue reading
"Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves" Episode 11 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1970 World War 2 heist movie, Kelly's Heroes. Mark and Ryan talk about Ryan's trip to Dubai, the futility of War and whether Saddam Hussein has ever had a night out in Dublin. Please get in touch and let us know if yo…
…
continue reading
"Happy New Year, Sarge" Episode 10 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2005 siege remake, Assault On Precinct 13. Mark and Ryan talk about SWAT tactics, basic therapy and horny cops. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see on in future episodes and to suggest a film…
…
continue reading
"It's Showtime" Episode 9 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1988 horror comedy classic, Beetlejuice. Mark and Ryan talk about ghosts, the Fringe and Alec Baldwin's shooting technique. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see on in future episodes and to suggest a f…
…
continue reading
"Your best? Losers whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom Queen" Episode 8 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1996 action classic The Rock. Mark and Ryan talk about sharing a bed, how cool Sean Connery is and Chinese bears. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests …
…
continue reading
"No sense being a grifter if it's the same as being a citizen" Episode 7 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 1973 conman caper The Sting. Mark and Ryan talk about Banksy, scams they have been involved in and which one of them is better looking. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests…
…
continue reading
"My handle's Rat. Call me Rat" Episode 6 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2003 science ignoring disaster film The Core. Mark and Ryan talk about holidays, phallic symbols and exploding Popes. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see on in future episodes and to su…
…
continue reading
"Did you kill a cheetah?" Episode 5 of Absolute Cuts sees hosts Mark Nelson and Ryan Cullen discuss the 2000 cross country sex comedy, Road Trip. Mark and Ryan talk about mushrooms, chemical burns and how Tom Green was ever famous. Please get in touch and let us know if you enjoy the podcast, what guests you'd like to see on in future episodes and …
…
continue reading