Don’t Stare, See Me: A Conversation

myFace, myStory

On this month's myFace, myStory podcast episode, host Dina Zuckerberg is joined by Naomi Levinshtein and Aaliyah Booker. They will share their personal journeys, and their advocacy work, and discuss the profound importance of the "Don't Stare, See Me" campaign for themselves and their community.

- [Announcer] Welcome to "myFace, myStory: Voices from the Craniofacial Community" with your host Dina Zuckerberg.

- Hello and welcome to "myFace, myStory: Voices from the Craniofacial Community." Whether you're watching on YouTube or listening on Apple Podcasts, click subscribe now so that you'll never miss a future episode. And if you're a fan of "myFace, myStory" rate and review the program on Apple Podcasts, so we can better get our message of inclusivity and empowerment to more people. I'm your host, Dina Zuckerberg, the Director of Family Programs at myFace. I was born with a cleft lip, hearing loss, and no vision in my left eye. "myFace, myStory" is about people like us being seen and heard, about sharing stories within the craniofacial community and with others. Today I will be joined by Aaliyah Booker and Naomi Heather. Aaliyah Booker is a facial difference and disability advocate. She's also a D1 student athlete at St. Peter's University, majoring in biology, aspiring to work in the medical field. She too was born with Goldenhar syndrome, which came with a long road of surgeries, therapies, and a lot of rehabilitation. Aaliyah shares her story to empower the youth who look different, that different is beautiful, and to prove to society that we are more than just our differences. You can find her on all social media platforms celebrating her uniqueness, especially on YouTube, interviewing others within the facial difference community, for them to share their story as well as their accomplishments and goals. Additionally, she recently started her own business, Born to Stand Out, that focuses on self-love and acceptance. Naomi Heather is a 24-year-old makeup artist, photographer, Brooklyn College graduate, and facial equality advocate born with Van der Woude syndrome. Naomi loves blending her art with her advocacy and believes everyone deserves to feel beautiful. You can find her on Instagram at NaomiHeatherMakeup, where she showcases her makeup and photography. Welcome Aaliyah and Naomi, and we look forward to our conversation, hi.

- Hi.

- So, can you each share about your facial difference for those you may not know, and tell us how many surgeries you've had? And I'll start with Aaliyah.

- Oh, Dina again, it's so good to see you again.

- Yeah.

- But, like you said, I was born with Goldenhar syndrome, and Goldenhar syndrome is a facial difference where your facial features is, some of them are underdeveloped, and for me, it only affected the left side of my face. And that means I was born with a underdeveloped mandible, underdeveloped ear, and underdeveloped eye. And within that, I had like multiple surgeries. I can't remember, like let's say, I had like over 26 surgeries we can say.

- Wow.

- And within that, you know, that didn't stop me for anything, you know. Right after those surgery, therapies, you know, I went straight to, you know, practice or anything, so, that's Goldenhar syndrome and it didn't affect me.

- And Naomi?

- I was born with Van der Woude syndrome, popliteal pterygium syndrome, kind of a mix between the two. I've had around 20 surgeries. It affected my lips. So I had a bilateral cleft lip and palate. I had bottom lip pits. So I have a lot of scarring here and it affected my nose and my hearing. So yeah, that's me.

- Thank you both. I can't imagine having that many surgeries. I only had six growing up, so, yeah. So how has growing up with a facial difference affected your life? Give us a glimpse into your life growing up with a facial difference. Aliyah?

- Me? Okay. So growing up with the facial difference, you know, I wouldn't say it was just always as tough. I feel like everyone always said it is tough, but I was brought in an amazing and strong family and they never treated me any different. They like how we should, you know, we're all human. There shouldn't be any, you know, oh, just because I have a difference, oh, I should be treated differently. No, we're all the same. And, you know, just being raised in a great family, you know, they really uplift my spirits even though when I was down and like, you know, just didn't feel like I belonged. You know, they always reminded me like, you do belong. There's nothing wrong with you.

- Yeah.

- And they're actually right. There isn't, and wasn't nothing wrong with me. And, yeah, I did have my times. I did have my moments like everyone in the craniofacial community did. And, but I didn't let that stop me at all. You know, I did everything. Like I have three brothers and I did, I wanted to do everything they wanted to do and I did. So like say they did karate, I did karate, say they did football, I tried to play football, but you know, I was just a regular kid, regular kid. And growing up with the facial differences, yeah, we had, I had multiple surgeries, therapies and a lot of rehabilitation. But, they always made it so much fun for me. I, even though I hated going to the hospital 'cause I never understood why I needed to go, but I did at the same time. But I think I was just so ashamed of, you know, of being there and why, and the reason of being there. 'Cause you know, being in a family, they're telling me like, oh, you don't look different, but why am I being put into a hospital doing these different things with different children? So I'm going to the hospital like, oh my gosh, like, what am I doing here? And I see all these children and they all had these differences. And I'm like, why am I here? I don't have a difference. Because my family is telling me like, oh, you're, there's nothing wrong with you. So it did confuse me for a minute, but then, you know, I would say like at a certain age, like around in middle school, that's when I realized I do have a difference. And it was really tough, you know, growing up, you know, going to school, you know, interacting with kids, you know, not everyone is too kind and, that really did something to me. And, you know, I didn't let it affect me too much because I always knew I had a, you know, I was always coming back to a place which is my home. I was always coming back to my family and they always reassured me. I was, you know, just me and Aaliyah, like, there's nothing wrong with you. So I was blessed to have such a amazing family. And even though I did have some trials and tribulations with growing up with the facial differences, it all led me to where I am today. Speaking in front of you and Naomi right here. Like, I, this is such a big blessing for me to overcome my battles and just share my story with y'all. Like, this is so much fun. It is so cool.

- Yeah.

- That's my experience of growing up with the facial difference.

- And I have met your family and I could see how they are such a huge support for you.

- Oh.

- And I always felt the same way when I was growing up, that my family was always there no matter what.

- Yeah. Mess. But I love them.

- Yeah. And Naomi, tell us about how your facial differences affected your life and give us a glimpse into your growing up.

- So, I mean, I think growing up with a facial differences affected me in many points of my life. I grew up with a single mom and so things were really hard for us growing up. I was always kind of like chronically ill on top of my cleft and had complications with it. So a lot of my medical problems kind of had to be watched over. I, but I also feel that it has brought my family very close together and they've always been really supportive of me and encouraging of me. I always kind of knew there was something different about me. I think like my first kind of interactions with kids my age kind of solidified that for me. But I, luckily I was, had really lovely mother. I had a lovely brother that didn't allow me to stop what I wanted to do or let me feel that my difference made me less than. I had a lot of issues connecting with people my own age growing up. Not in the sense that there was like anything wrong, but I think kids can behave negatively to what they do not understand. And I was always, you know, a very loud, proud person. So I came into a few bad bullies. And in a way I do think that it shaped my life and my perspective of the world and people. But I don't see that as a negative per se. I just acknowledge it. I, but yeah, I feel really grateful to be who I am no matter what I went through, because I feel as though my experiences growing up with my cleft, with all these medical problems has helped nurture a very empathetic spirit.

- Right.

- Resilient kind of personality and I found a piece of my purpose because of it, which is advocating for people like me. So, yeah, that's me.

- Wow. Speaking of purpose, what inspired you to become a makeup artist?

- So I found makeup one year when I was dealing with a lot of medical issues. So, makeup kind of became a comfort for me. It became a way to express myself because I always felt as a kid that people were looking at me and talking about the way I looked. But with makeup I felt like a sense of control in that and a way to express myself visually and show people not only who I am, but also my talent and my craft. And to this day it's become sort of a comfort place, something that soothes me and gives me peace. And I feel like everyone, no matter what, should look for that one thing that helps center them. So that's, makeup has been my thing.

- I have to say, you've in some ways, 'cause I never like wearing makeup, it's still, I find it hard, especially when I'm accentuating my lips. But you actually inspire me to think more about it and to take more risk with that, so, thank you for that.

- No problem. I mean, I think amazing things happen when you step out of your comfort zone. And I think we can always surprise ourselves. And I think there is a misconception with makeup that makeup is meant to hide. I personally don't see it that way. I see it as if something makes you feel more comfortable and something that makes you want to express yourself or just feel good, like feel glamorous, like why not? Why is that a negative thing? Yeah, I mean that's how like, I mean I, my first piece of makeup I got when I was a kid was concealer-

- Right.

- 'Cause I wanted to cover up my scars, but it took some time until I rediscovered it again and saw it in a very different way.

- I love that. So Aaliyah, I love your phrase different is beautiful. Tell us more about that.

- Oh, of course. So, I always say that, you know, ever since I started my advocacy journey, which was a year ago, that was like one of my like catchphrase. And whenever I say that, beauty has no standards and growing up with a facial difference, I always thought I would, I had to fit in a standard. I thought I would never, ever be placed in a standard within society's viewpoint.

- Right.

- And growing up as a, you know, a young girl and just, you know, looking around, always going out in society and just seeing how other, you know, I always had this jealousy part of myself. You know, seeing other girls like looking normal, looking all cute, looking just, you know, no differences, no traumas to the face, nothing. So yeah, basically every time I stepped out in society, you know, I always viewed myself, always belittle myself when I always stepped out, when I was younger and seeing all, you know, different type of, you know, young girls being themselves and just, you know, looking all pretty and everything. I never thought I could ever fit in that category. And, with the phrase different is beautiful, I can finally live up to this 'cause I finally build self-love, self-acceptance. And what I'm trying to say with that phrase is that different is beautiful and I feel like people use the term different in such a negative way.

- Right.

- And I wanted to, you know, bring light to that term 'cause different is beautiful and there's the beauty of different, I feel like people don't really see the beauty in things until you actually get to know them. I feel you gotta peel off the layers, get to know, you don't, you can't judge a book by its cover. And I feel like, you know, everyone within the craniofacial community can agree with this. Like, we have been judged based on our appearances our whole life, our whole life, which is unacceptable. Like what are we doing? And it is just crazy how society has just like, just stamped and input that in everyone's viewpoint and just, you know, just one look at me, they're just gonna base me off and just, oh, she can't do this or she can't do that.

- Right.

- You know, so with different is beautiful I just wanna make it known that, you know, we can do more than just, we can do more than what others perceive us of doing. You feel me? But what different is beautiful, I just really wanted to make it known to anyone within the craniofacial community or anyone that even has a difference. Doesn't have to be a facial difference, just difference in general that you're absolutely beautiful 'cause I didn't hear that phrase growing up. So I really want the youth definitely to hear that phrase because it is true and it's possible and yeah.

- And I think the first thing people see is the face.

- Yeah.

- And then people make judgements on that first look without necessarily finding out more and that's

- Yeah.

- the difficulty.

- Yeah.

- Naomi, how do you think about beauty? How do you define it?

- I mean, I don't think there is one definition of beauty. I believe that, I mean like how can you define such a word when it's so reliant on everyone's individual perception or opinion?

- Right.

- You know, to piggyback off what you were saying with beauty standards. Beauty standards have evolved all throughout history. You know, some of the most like oddest things, I'm sure have been an object of, you know, affection or attraction all throughout history.

- Right.

- So, knowing that it evolves and knowing that it is completely dependent on where you are, reminds me that the only person that really matters is myself and the people around me that celebrate me. So that's one thing. And another way I view beauty is I believe people that are living authentically, like themselves, and being themselves are the most beautiful of people. I think it requires a lot of bravery to be yourself in a society. As cliche as that sounds, I think for many, many years since the dawn of time, anything that has stood out has been hammered down. And I'm really grateful to be living in a time where I think we're starting to see a shift in that. So I just think people that do what they love, are loyal to themselves and their values, and who they are, are the most beautiful people. Which is why I think Aaliyah is like stunning.

- I agree with you wholeheartedly. I think that when you are authentic, when you are your true self, that's where your beauty shines. And I have to say, that is challenging and hard to do sometimes, but that's when you really are beautiful. So I agree with that.

- Thank you.

- So Naomi, you recently started taking photos as well as being a makeup artist. And I can say that you're really good at it. I've seen some of your work. Can you tell us about your campaign, "Don't Stare, See Me."

- So, I came up with this project probably long before I even knew the settings of a camera. I think it was always kind of destined for me. I just needed the right tools. And I think once I started taking makeup more seriously as a job, as a career, it pushed me to take up the camera. And then I started seeing all the possibilities that come with being your own muse, your own, you know, creative producer and doing your own thing, instead of waiting for someone else to do it. Because I really haven't seen too many campaigns featuring people like us. So I got this idea, I spoke about it with you, Dina.

- Right.

- And you guys helped me nurture this idea into fruition. So basically the whole premise is to be able to share the beauty that is the craniofacial community in a more artistic lens. I think my first kind of episode, rendition, I was just getting my feet wet. But now I'm starting to see my creative side come through because I feel as though, like a lot of the images I have seen of people like us are quite, how do I say? They're tame. They're like, we're human, you know. Which is important and necessary, but I wanna show we're more than just human.

- Right.

- We can be beautiful, we can be attractive, we can be powerful in anything we wanna be, because that's how I always felt. That's how I always wanted to present in my head. So, I got a group of people together and I'm really grateful. I'm starting to see it, you know, grow more. I brought people on my team. I met an amazing designer named Theo, who helped me with the large project, with Aaliyah, with the whole group. It was, I'm really grateful for that. And I hope the more this project expands, the more people see it, the more it can be socially acceptable to be people like us and not have to hide who we are or feel like we can't be those gorgeous people we see on a magazine. Because why the heck not?

- Yeah.

- I agree.

- Why not?

- Absolutely. Aaliyah, you participated in one of the photo shoots that Naomi did. What was that like for you?

- Oh, it was beautiful. Like, that was my first ever time, like first time being, you know, behind the camera, doing the whole process, makeup, hair, I'm getting ready. And at first I'm not gonna lie, I was nervous. I was scared because I never, you know, celebrated my uniqueness like that, you know, and advocate in a way like that. So I was a little hesitant, but you know, you gotta put yourself outta your comfort zone to be able to be who you're, you know, authentic self, who, you know, who you're made to be. And when Naomi messaged me, I was like, oh my God, like this is so cool. Like, I always, I, when I tell you, I followed Naomi before she hit me up. So it was such an honor to hear from her, like, oh my God, you wanna talk about me, me?

- Right.

- Overall, it was such a great environment to be around, to be in a space with other people, with facial differences and just to behind the camera, oh my gosh. When I was behind that camera, I was a whole nother person. You couldn't stop me. And for the first time I felt seen, I felt alive and I felt beautiful. And, it was just like a wake up calling for me is like, wow, like, this can be something that I can do. This can be something that the whole craniofacial can do, which is modeling, which I never thought I could ever be when I was younger. Like me, a model like, I have differences. Why am I, you know, being viewed, but like just being behind that camera, I felt, like Naomi said, powerful. I felt so, so beautiful. And it was just such a amazing feeling. And I know that everyone else did as well. And we had such a great time. We had a great group. Like Naomi said, Theo the designer, he hooked us up with some exquisite designs he created and he just brought it to life. And Naomi, you know, she captured everyone's beauty and everyone's essence. It was just such a amazing time and I, that, I feel like that moment is, I always will cherish that moment because like I said, it literally switched the flip, flip in my head and I'm like, okay, now it's time to, you know, cause chaos but good chaos within craniofacial community. You know, it's time to wake us up. It's time to wake up 'cause we deserve to have our face seen and it deserves to be seen and be blasted on like a billboard or anything 'cause why not? Why not?

- We need to get it out there. We certainly, I've seen these photos, they are gorgeous and I watched the whole process and I wanna participate in the next one. That's my-

- I want you so bad. You imagine Dina in a gown, like I'm, I have the whole vision in my head, like a nice gown with her hair, like blown up.

- I would love that

- Ah, ah. It's gonna be so good. It's gonna be so, I am manifesting it. I'm putting out into the universe. It's gonna happen. It's gonna happen.

- It's happening.

- I'm excited. I am totally excited.

- Me too.

- So do you think there's more representation of people with facial differences in the media? Are we making any headway, you think?

- I think we are. I think we are. I mean, Rome wasn't built in a day of course, you know, but I have been seeing more people included and it makes me really excited. I mean, I know someone in the community, Justin Stewart has a cleft nose and he was in a tell bar campaign, which is insane.

- Yeah.

- But seeing, I'm seeing things slowly move, you know?

- Right.

- I see albinism, I see people with scars, you know, it's baby steps. And I think we're on the right track.

- We are definitely on the right track. Like you said, Justin Stewart, he's out there showing out. He, it's just crazy. I know, what's his name? Austin Halls.

- Yes. So good.

- Singer, model, like it continues and he's so like vibrant in his energy and he does not care what anybody says, but like his social media, his presence, it gives so much life and that's what we need. We need to show that to the craniofacial community, especially to the youth, especially to the teenagers, you know,

- Right.

- because they need to see that this is possible. You can be who you wanna be and express it beautifully well. You know, and, you know, like Naomi said, you know, it doesn't take a day to build Rome, you know, this is baby steps, baby steps. And you know, I feel like we're on a great track. We're, you know, doing this right here, this podcast, this YouTube series, this is a big step. But these are baby steps, you feel me? And we're all, we're going the right way, we're going the right direction. But it's just so good to have, you know, good and amazing people in our corner, in the craniofacial community that is enforcing a light and you know, pushing down doors, breaking down barriers for us so we know that we're capable of doing this. You know, such a nice way, beauty, come on. She's already breaking down the beauty standards and just breaking down these doors and just showing up to her, her job and her environment. You know, just doing the actions

- Absolutely.

- She's advocating because she's showing others that, okay, I look different, but I'm doing what I'm gonna do and I'm gonna do it lovely 'cause this is what I love. You feel me? You're not gonna take that away from me. You know, so just doing her daily activities, that's a big way of advocating and she's doing it in the beauty world and I feel like we're dominating and we're just gonna continue to dominate and yeah.

- Well, representation matters, right?

- Yep.

- Absolutely.

- It does. Yeah.

- The benefit of social media is that, you know, more people have the ability to create platforms and share their stories.

- Right.

- So it's much harder for people to be able to pick and choose whose voice really matters.

- Right.

- Right.

- So, you know, say what we want about how, you know, social media can be pretty toxic. It is the kind of fuel for change in our community, I would say.

- Right.

- Right. Right. And I, it's crazy you say it is toxic, social media can be toxic, but I realized that I've hid so much, like a part of me and like, so like, been so private and because of social media and how I felt about social media that, you know, the main reason I decided to open myself on social media is to change the narrative of social media. 'Cause like, if no one's doing, might as well, I do it for social media and I wanted to change, make it a positive environment for the youth. And I know I'm speaking, every time I speak, I always say the youth, because it really starts with the youth. It really starts-

- Right.

- How you're growing up in an environment. And my goal is to really start on social media and just spread a lot of kindness, love, positivity 'cause social media, it can really mess with you mentally if you're, you know, using it the wrong way. So I really wanna make a change with that social media side. And it's been working 'cause I've been seeing a lot of people on TikTok within the craniofacial community just talking, they're sharing their story and I've just been connecting with them. Like Naomi, I met Naomi on social media. I met so many other people like Justin Stewart, Austin Halls, Sophia, who was a part of the thing. Like, it just, I feel like once someone does it, everyone will start to do it. It's like a, you know, what's the a word? It's like a, it is like a, you know-

- The domino effect.

- Yeah, yeah. If someone sees you do it, you're gonna do it as well. So.

- Right.

- That's what I'm trying to teach to the other and the youth and it's just so cool, like I said, to see people just, you know, now celebrating your uniqueness on TikTok, whether it's Instagram, Facebook, and yeah, it's just been such a beautiful transformation, transformative thing to see what's the craniofacial. It just keeps on expanding, which is just so beautiful.

- Absolutely and it's something that I didn't grow up with. So seeing all this is just amazing to watch and I sometimes I wish I had that when I was growing up. So, to our audience, I hope that you're enjoying these, this episode of "myFace, myStory." Whether it's your first time joining us or you've been with us since the beginning, make sure you've subscribed to our YouTube and Apple Podcast channels and sign up for our mailing list at myface.org / mystory. Steven Speliotis, hopefully I'm saying that right. Recently did a short documentary about you both called "Don't Stare, See Me," which recently won the best newcomer documentary at the River Dance New York Short Film Festival, and was also nominated for the Berlin International Art Film Festival. What was that experience like for both of you to share this with the world?

- You go first Naomi? You go first.

- You know, I, it all happened so quickly. We only had a few days to shoot and it was first of all, incredible how fast Steven was able to throw this all together.

- Yeah.

- And, you know, Steven had a vision in his head, but he was always so open to thoughts, ideas, feelings, concerns. And I was really grateful for him, you know, to wanna take on my story. I think, like still, for me its, crazy to think that people aren't so interested in the things that I do, that, like that really mattered to me. And I'm really, really grateful for that. I'm grateful for him and I wish I could have been there to see it in theaters for the first time, I was away on vacation in Japan that I know Aaliyah did so.

- Yes.

- Good.

- And you can share what that experience was like.

- Oh my gosh, I was speechless. Like to see your face and to see someone else that you admire as well, just on a big screen that you never, ever, ever would imagine was such a surreal moment and an eye-opener. And just to share that moment with you, Dina, and the whole myFace and my parents-

- Yeah.

- Was, I just, it just, it was just such a memorable and beautiful moment that I will forever cherish and throughout the whole day just recording, "Don't Stare, See Me" film was just amazing as well, you know. Just sharing the meaning and just redefining beauty and how growing up with a facial difference in society today. And it was just so, you know, so important and so raw to just share with the world. And I felt like it needed to be talked about, you know, real things need to be talked about and sensitive topics.

- Yeah.

- Because it spreads awareness and that's when people will actually listen, you feel me? And it was just so nice to be vulnerable in front of Naomi, Steven and Theo. They made everything so comfortable. It was just such a beautiful time just expressing our beauty in different type of ways, you know. And that will be my second time modeling for Naomi and her photographing me. And it is always, it's always a time with her. And we just had so much fun. Like, if we could do it again, I would do it all over again and-

- We sure will.

- And Steven, he captured everyone's beauty. He captured all the moments, all the key points that needed to be, you know, talked about and seen and the way he just edited everything and just combined everything together. It just came out so beautiful. And I'm very blessed to be part of this and just, yeah, it was so nice. I did, Naomi, I did shout you out during the, on speaking, like, you know how we had to introduce the short film and that was my first ever short film festival ever. So I didn't, you know, expect anything so big. But then I walked in, I'm like, oh my god, I'm in the movie theaters watching myself.

- Right.

- I'm like, what is going on? And I'm like, wow, this is real, this is real and this is possible. This can be our future. And I feel like the people in the craniofacial community, we forget that.

- Yeah.

- We think that we're so less in our minds and it just based on society and how society treats us. But just, you know, just keep going, come through the fire, just keep going, you know, you never know. And just keeping you, authentically you, it you and you can be anything you want to. 'Cause I never thought I would be modeling in front of Naomi and being on a film like, that is crazy but it's possible. The impossible is possible.

- Absolutely.

- And I never thought I would be able to be an artist in any sense. I always thought I had to be a certain way or do a certain thing because I felt like a part of me was missing because of this.

- Right.

- But, you know, the older I get, the more I realize that just because I have had this experience doesn't mean I need to change-

- No.

- Who I'm.

- No.

- And that anything is possible and that, you know-

- Right.

- I'm engaged where my voice matters, where our voices matter. We're, you know, we're able to tell our stories and I'm really grateful.

- So I wanna let people know that they can find the short documentary "Don't Stare, See Me" on YouTube. So it is up there. So do you, have you found acceptance in your life? Or do you think it's a lifelong journey?

- Who you talking to, me?

- Yeah.

- Oh me. It is a lifelong journey, but I did find a good side of self-acceptance. Like I'm in a better mental space now. I know who I am. I'm still on the journey on finding who I am as well. Every day I'm growing, every day I'm learning more about the craniofacial community, better ways to advocate. It's been such a beautiful experience to, you know, be on. And, you know, I'm literally at the point like, yeah, no one can't tell me anything. Like no one's opinion really matters, you know, 'cause I've been so caught up on that all my life, well, not all my life, majority of my life. And it feels so good to be free and just like, just on a mission, on self re-defining self and reinventing myself and just exploring things I never, you know, thought of doing and just building new interests. And it's just been such a great time. I've just been having so much fun, you know, just playing around with different ways to advocate and just being myself in different ways, like modeling, like I never thought that would be an interest in mine. And now it's like becoming like a thing that, like I think I can really do this, like take it as like a serious job. And I know I can, and I know I'm powerful with it. So I'm just, my mind is just all over the place. And I, and it's good. It's good because back then, like I mentioned, I didn't, I wasn't able to, you know, brainstorm ideas like that because I thought less of myself, I thought, I belittle myself and-

- Right.

- I hated that and so now I'm in a better space, state of mind and I hope to continue, well, I am, not hope 'cause it is going keep going. I hope to always, what's the word? To always exalt self-confidence to others so they know that, you know, just because I have a difference doesn't make me ugly, doesn't make me more, you know, just, you know, not what society portrays us to be. So, that's my big goal, you know, be the image for the craniofacial community. Yeah and just preach that with self-love. Everything I do is self-acceptance, self love. So yeah.

- So who are your role models?

- I wouldn't say I have role models. I do have inspirations. I really look up to, well, are you talking about like in the craniofacial community or in general?

- In the, it can be either one, in the craniofacial community or... Who's that one person that-

- Oh, one person?

- Yeah. Let's try one person.

- One person. My mom.

- Okay.

- My Mom, I know she's not in the craniofacial community, but-

- She is.

- Yes, she's a part of it.

- Included, yes.

- Exactly. Exactly. She is. But my mom, she knew like when I was born that I was going to tell my story. She knew, she kept all the receipts and she literally told me this, like when I started my journey, she was like, Aaliyah, I always knew you were gonna tell your story, but I didn't know when or how you will. But, she's my rock. She's been there through everything, all my surgeries, everything. And she accepted me for who I am. And she just been so, she's just such a determined and just such a, mom, I can't even say the word for you 'cause you already know who you are. But you know, she made me the woman I am today. You know, my mom is a boss of her own, she is her own entrepreneur and she has a whole business. So just seeing that and just watching her, you know, as me growing up, just watching her dominate the way she runs her business, the way she runs her household, the way she, you know, makes me feel and the way she raises me. It just brings out the best of me. And it made my personality and it made me who I am today. So shout out Ms. Gloria Booker 'cause that's my girl, for real 'cause without her I don't think I would've, I would be here today and just speaking in front of you. So that's my girl.

- And Naomi, who's your inspiration or a role model. You have somebody?

- You know, after you saying your mom, I'm like, dang, if I don't say my mom, I'm kidding, I kidding. She's up there like-

- She's up there.

- Susie Q, I love you so much. But I think my role model, not to be a kiss up or anything would be Dina. I think Dina was the first person I ever met with a craniofacial condition that I really connected with, that I felt was a really good influence to me. Dina has always encouraged my projects and has taken me seriously when there were times where I definitely did not. You know, to like piggyback off what the previous question of, is self-acceptance like, have I reached it or is it like a continuous thing? I personally think it's a continuous thing. There are times where I feel super authentically myself and I love myself and there are times I don't. And, you know, Dina has always been a driving force to me and never let me give up on my own ideas. So, yeah, you.

- Thank you. Thank you and so last question for both of you with maybe one word or say three words. Who do you see when you look in the mirror today? Aaliyah?

- One word

- Or three. You can do three words to describe who you see when you look in the mirror today.

- Okay. Three words. An icon. Huh? What's the two other ones? An advocate and a change maker.

- I love that. And Naomi?

- I would say, I'm resilient. I am charismatic. And, it's not exactly like a one word, but I'm full of love.

- Love it. And I say to both of you how true that is. So Aaliyah and Naomi, thank you both for sharing your journey with us. The confidence that you both have is something that I wish I had when I was your age, and I can't wait to see what the future holds for you. No doubt you will change lives. You already are. So thank you.

- Thank you.

- Thank you, Dina. I love you.

- Aaliyah and Naomi are an inspiration to me and everyone they meet. Everyone has a story and I am hopeful that by sharing stories like theirs, that we can create a kinder world. For more than 70 years, myFace has been dedicated to changing the faces and transforming the lives of children and adults with facial differences by providing access to holistic, comprehensive care, education, resources, and support that pave the way for better outcomes. To learn more, please visit myface.org. If you would like to learn more about the myFace Support Groups so that you can connect with others in the craniofacial community, please visit myface.org/online-groups. Be sure to subscribe to "myFace, myStory" on your favorite podcast app and on YouTube to get notified of our next episode. If you'd like to receive email reminders of new episodes, sign up at myface.org/mystory. That's myface.org/mystory. Thank you for joining us for this episode of "myFace, myStory." Remember, it takes courage to share your story, so be brave and speak out.

- Hi, I'm Stephanie Paul, the Executive Director of myFace. myFace is a nonprofit organization dedicated to changing the faces and transforming the lives of children and adults with facial differences. We do this through various programs and events such as the Transforming Lives Educational Webinar Series, Races for Faces, The Wonder Project, and the groundbreaking, "myFace, myStory" Conversational Series. You can learn more about all of these on our website at myface.org. If you enjoyed today's program, we hope you'll consider making a donation to help keep programs like this possible as well as to further the support of the craniofacial community. Thank you.