The War and Treaty’s Michael and Tanya Trotter grew up in Cleveland, Ohio, and Washington, DC, respectively, but both have family roots in the South. They also grew up in the musical traditions of their churches – Tanya in the Black Baptist Church and Michael in the Seventh Day Adventist Church – where they learned the power of song to move people. After becoming a father at a very young age, Michael eventually joined the armed forces and served in Iraq and Germany, where he took up songwriting as a way of dealing with his experiences there. Meanwhile Tanya embarked on a singing and acting career after a breakthrough appearance in Sister Act 2 alongside Whoopi Goldberg and Lauryn Hill. Now, after a long and sometimes traumatic journey, Michael and Tanya are married, touring, winning all sorts of awards, and set to release their fifth album together, and their fourth as The War and Treaty. Sid talks to Michael and Tanya about the new record, Plus One , as well as their collaboration with Miranda Lambert, what it was like to record at FAME studios in Muscle Shoals, and how they’re blending country, soul, gospel, and R&B. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…
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29: Finding Strength in Vulnerability | Healing the Fawning Response
Manage episode 407509515 series 3562478
内容由Kristen Alderson and Leslie Inlow提供。所有播客内容（包括剧集、图形和播客描述）均由 Kristen Alderson and Leslie Inlow 或其播客平台合作伙伴直接上传和提供。如果您认为有人在未经您许可的情况下使用您的受版权保护的作品，您可以按照此处概述的流程进行操作https://zh.player.fm/legal。
Does being a good partner mean always responding with what we think the other person wants to hear? In this episode of Beyond What Hurts Us, Kristen and Leslie take a deep dive into Fawning, a common but lesser known trauma response (there's more than just fight or flight - who knew?!).
We all encounter moments when societal pressures or past experiences make it challenging to be our authentic selves. Join us as we explore what the fawning response is and how it functions as a trauma reaction. We dive into practical advice for embracing vulnerability and establishing healthy boundaries.
Whether you've experienced trauma or simply want to lead a more authentic life, this episode offers a roadmap for personal growth and healing. Tune in to discover the strength that arises from embracing your vulnerability and taking steps toward a more genuine and empowered version of yourself and get more 'you' in your life.
82集单集
分享Manage episode 407509515 series 3562478
内容由Kristen Alderson and Leslie Inlow提供。所有播客内容（包括剧集、图形和播客描述）均由 Kristen Alderson and Leslie Inlow 或其播客平台合作伙伴直接上传和提供。如果您认为有人在未经您许可的情况下使用您的受版权保护的作品，您可以按照此处概述的流程进行操作https://zh.player.fm/legal。
Does being a good partner mean always responding with what we think the other person wants to hear? In this episode of Beyond What Hurts Us, Kristen and Leslie take a deep dive into Fawning, a common but lesser known trauma response (there's more than just fight or flight - who knew?!).
We all encounter moments when societal pressures or past experiences make it challenging to be our authentic selves. Join us as we explore what the fawning response is and how it functions as a trauma reaction. We dive into practical advice for embracing vulnerability and establishing healthy boundaries.
Whether you've experienced trauma or simply want to lead a more authentic life, this episode offers a roadmap for personal growth and healing. Tune in to discover the strength that arises from embracing your vulnerability and taking steps toward a more genuine and empowered version of yourself and get more 'you' in your life.
82集单集
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In this episode of Beyond What Hurts Us , Kristen and Leslie take a fresh look at the early 2000s dating advice phenomenon He's Just Not That Into You . While the book was intended to empower women to recognize when a man isn’t invested, we discuss why its message falls short in today’s dating landscape. We explore how the book places all the emphasis on whether he is interested—without ever asking if she is. It also ignores the emotional complexity of relationships, failing to acknowledge the very real grief that can come with the end of a relationship or even a situationship. At the heart of our conversation is a call for a more compassionate and nuanced approach to dating—one that prioritizes mutual respect, emotional honesty, and treating others the way we want to be treated. Whether you’re navigating dating disappointments or seeking healthier connections, this episode offers hope, guidance, and a much-needed reframe.…
This week on Beyond What Hurts Us, Kristen and Leslie dive into the complexities of relationships, exploring themes of abandonment, emotional literacy, and the art of mindful loving. From discussing the power of movement and embracing our "wild woman" to unpacking the five A's of healthy relationships—attention, affection, acceptance, appreciation, and allowing—we reflect on what it means to truly show up for ourselves and others. We share personal stories, insights from books like The Women Who Run With Wolves and How to Be an Adult in Relationships, and practical tips for navigating abandonment wounds and fostering connection. Join us as we lean into curiosity, embrace vulnerability, and begin to redefine how we engage in relationships with a deeper sense of awareness and intention.…
In this episode, Kristen and Leslie are joined by Brandy Cunningham to explore the intersection of recovery and personal choice. Together, they dive into the complexities of addiction, the structure of programs like AA, and the nuanced process of reclaiming agency after trauma. Brandy shares her experiences navigating recovery, challenging norms, and forging a unique path toward healing. Whether you're in recovery, supporting someone who is, or curious about the journey, this conversation offers fresh perspectives and actionable insights.…
As the calendar turns to a fresh page, Kristen and Leslie embark on a reflective journey to set intentions for the year ahead. Together, they discuss the rituals of closing out the old year, choosing a "word of the year," and pulling a tarot card to explore its deeper meaning. Tune in for an inspiring conversation filled with personal insights, growth, and practical tips to embrace a "New Year, New Me" mindset.…
In this episode, Kristen and Leslie dive into the profound work of uncovering core beliefs and patterns that shape our lives, especially in relationships. Leslie leads Kristen to reflect on her experiences with perfectionism, over-functioning, and self-reliance, tracing their roots back to childhood. Through an open discussion on Internal Family Systems (IFS) and EMDR therapy, Kristen and Leslie explore how deeply ingrained beliefs—like "I can only rely on myself"—manifest in adulthood and relationships. Together, they process what it means to observe yourself, acknowledge emotional needs, and move toward healing from the inside out.…
Do you ever feel paralyzed by the pressure to be perfect? To be honest, this episode almost didn’t make it to air because the audio isn’t flawless. But in the spirit of embracing imperfection, Kristen and Leslie decided to share it anyway. Together, they dive into the roots of perfectionist panic —that overwhelming fear of falling short or making mistakes—and how it impacts our mental health, relationships, and creativity. Leslie offers insights through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS), helping us understand the parts of ourselves that drive perfectionism, where they come from, and why they often mean well but hold us back. Kristen and Leslie explore how to approach these parts with curiosity and compassion, showing how perfectionism develops as a protective mechanism and how we can begin to let it go. This episode is a testament to growth over perfection. Tune in to discover how letting go of unrealistic expectations can lead to a life that’s not perfect but full of joy, progress, and authenticity.…
In this week's episode, Kristen and Leslie explore the idea that healing often lies in the balance between extremes. Why do polarized emotions or opinions keep us stuck, and how can embracing the “shades of gray” in tough situations help us move forward? By finding the middle ground, we open ourselves to growth, understanding, and deeper healing. Join us as we discuss how balance is not about compromise but about clarity and peace.…
In this episode, Kristen and Leslie confront the difficult reality of discovering abusive behavior in people we once admired and explore the red flags we might have missed or dismissed. We discuss the emotional impact of shattered perceptions, why we sometimes ignore warning signs, and how to rebuild trust in our own judgment. This conversation is about learning to recognize and believe red flags, setting healthier boundaries, and finding resilience to move forward with clarity and self-assurance.…
In this episode, Kristen and Leslie explore how curiosity and asking questions can shift our perspectives, even on seemingly simple things like sports. Why do we get so emotionally invested in whether "our team" wins or loses? By examining these reactions, we uncover the layers of identity, connection, and loyalty that play into our intense feelings for sports teams. Join us as we discuss how understanding these emotional ties can help us grow in empathy and self-awareness, and even heal our approach to relationships and community.…
In this heartfelt episode, Kristen and Leslie sit down with Chelsea Ohlemiller, author of Now That She’s Gone, a deeply personal memoir chronicling her journey through grief after losing her mother. Chelsea shares the profound lessons learned from her mother's life, her grief, and how she’s found healing through preserving her legacy. Join us as we discuss the impact of love, loss, and how embracing a loved one’s memory can offer comfort and a path toward peace.…
Can we just stop the bullsh*t? In this episode, Kristen and Leslie dive deep into the emotional dynamics of the pursuer-withdrawer relationship and how to break free from the exhausting push-and-pull cycle. Instead of focusing on labels, we'll shift the focus to what truly matters: the relationship itself. Join us as we explore practical steps for healing attachment wounds, improving communication, and moving towards a healthier, more secure connection—no labels required.…
In this episode, Kristen and Leslie explore the transformative power of gratitude as a tool for healing. By choosing to focus on what we’re thankful for, we can shift our mindset, allowing positivity and growth to flourish in our lives. We’ll dive into how gratitude helps us move beyond pain, heal emotional wounds, and create space for joy. Join us as we discuss practical ways to cultivate gratitude and watch the healing that follows.…
In this episode, Kristen and Leslie dive into the journey of moving from self-abandonment to self-love, exploring how you can shift your mindset to view yourself as "the one." We’ll discuss the importance of breaking patterns of neglecting your own needs and how to cultivate a deeper connection with yourself. It’s about learning to prioritize your well-being and embracing the love and worth you deserve.…
In this special episode, Kristen and her daughter Kendall take a break from the show's usual focus on healing to explore the joy that can be found all around us. While Beyond What Hurts Us typically dives deep into self-discovery and emotional well-being, we believe it's just as important to pause and appreciate the simple, beautiful moments life has to offer. Join us as we share stories, laughter, and a few surprises from our everyday adventures, reminding ourselves that healing isn't just about looking inward—it's also about embracing the happiness in our lives. Come along for a heartwarming conversation filled with jo…
Have people in your life fallen away? What makes some relationships worth pursuing and others not? Listen this week as Kristen and Leslie reveal their hearts and thoughts on what repair actually looks like and what's required to work through conflict. Join them as they share their personal insights on the true nature of repair—what it takes to work through conflict, heal wounds, and rebuild connections. Whether you're facing challenges in friendships, family dynamics, or romantic relationships, this conversation offers a heartfelt exploration of how to navigate the ebbs and flows of human connection with grace and intention.…
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