36 - Let your Yes say No

B-RAD with Brad Toews

Our souls are not hungry for fame, comfort, wealth or power, our souls are hungry for meaning, for the sense that we have figured out how to live so that our lives matter. So that the world will be at least a little bit different for our having passed through it. ~ Rabbi Harold Kushner

Kyle Kirschbaum is a close friend and mentor of mine.

In this interview he shares from personal experience the importance of identifying what we’re saying Yes to in our lives. And then making choices to live that Yes.

Kyle’s childhood and his unique temperament cultivated in him a desire to go after what he wants in life. But it wasn’t until he learned the lesson of saying No to somethings that he started to see the results in saying Yes to the more important things.

This is a lesson Kyle has learned over and and over again, as we all do in any growth, professional or personal.

Saying Yes in the modern age usually means saying No to the tug of social media specifically. A tension in Kyle’s own life that he talks about with candor and integrity.

Turns out it’s pretty difficult to listen to your heart and bring to life the unique things only you can do when you’re constantly scrolling on social media. A lesson Kyle has learned the hard way.

Sooner or later because of social media, a lack of clarity, or reaching a plateau in our life, we’ll experience the discomfort of feeling stuck and dissatisfied.

Kyle proposes three questions to ask yourself when you’re feeling stuck.

1. Have you said yes to too many things? Every Yes to something means No to something else.
2. Has social media taken over your life? You need to eliminate the distractions that drain your creativity.
3. Do you need to overcommit to your goals? Sometimes raising the stakes on a dream or a goal, investing resources and time, helps push us to the next level of doing the work to make it happen.

You don’t leap at your goals. You step there.

What’s the next step you can take to move in the direction of where your heart is calling?

Taking those steps, doing the work, that’s the magic of life.

There is something specific, unique and true about each one of us, that only our individual selves can take ownership for.

Ideas that want to be expressed in this particular body, at this particular time, in this particular person.

It takes courage to say Yes to those ideas. It takes work. The system doesn’t bend to make it easy for you, you are going to change the system.

The things that really matter in life, loving other people and doing good work, aren’t cheap. Our Yes will cost us something, in time, resources, and effort. But it’s our very choices that are the gateway to the changes we want to make in our lives, to the professional, creative, relational, and spiritual growth we seek.

Join me in this episode where we get honest about social media in our lives, reflect on life-changing adventures and projects, and challenge each other to say a hearty Yes with our life with body, mind, and spirit to work of living.

Music by OBOY.

Shownotes, links, and video at Brad Toews.