Serving Others Well

愛、生活、人生系列

In a world with limitless access to choices, we often find ourselves too overwhelmed to make a choice (or afraid of doing the wrong thing) and we might choose to make no choice at all. Our fear of doing the wrong thing stops us from doing anything, which precludes (排除) us from serving anyone at all.
Steps to Serving Others Well
1. Change Our Position
We can serve others well when we actively decide to take on the role of a servant. It’s easy to unconsciously view ourselves as the saviors of those that we serve. But, we really have to believe that everyone else in the room is just as important as us. By positioning ourselves in this way, we force ourselves to leave our personal agenda behind and elevate the importance of each person we are serving. Changing our position naturally leads to doing more to dignify those we serve.
2. Take Time to Listen
It’s easy to assume we know what’s best for others and to simply give them that material thing. But, if we seek to serve others well, the best thing we can do is take the time to get to know people and honor them with a listening ear. If we skip this step, we make it a lot more about the good feeling we get from helping than we do about actually serving someone else. We believe that the simple act of listening is a powerful way to serve. There is so much power in being intentional with the way we build relationships. Sometimes, sitting down with someone, sharing a cup of coffee, and listening to others’ stories do a lot to others. Besides, the gift of time is often more valuable to the receiver and more satisfying for the giver than the gift of money. We don’t all have the same amount of money, but we all do have time on our hands, and can give some of this time to help others—whether that means we devote our lifetimes to service, or just give a few hours each day or a few days a year.
3. Care, Even When It Costs Us Something
When we listen to others, their needs might surprise us. By simply making the statement, “Let me know how I can help,” we’re opening ourselves up to a world of needs, not just the ones that are convenient or fit nicely into the time we’ve allotted (分配) to help. Moreover, the act of caring might not always require big, dramatic actions. Caring for another person might mean only sharing a cup of coffee or a slice of pizza.
4. Recognize We Might Not Be the Whole Solution
When we’ve listened to the full magnitude of someone’s stories, we all have a natural inclination to want to either fix everything or create distance from what we can’t fix. But when we seek to serve others well, we can take comfort in knowing that we are rarely the whole solution, and that’s okay. To serve others well, we need to have faith that we are ultimately serving someone greater. God is the one who will bring true changes to people’s lives and circumstances. We only try our best to love people where they’re in difficulties. The realization that we’re not the whole solution gives us the freedom to share our time and attention without fear. Thus, even when it’s inconvenient to us, there is still something we can choose to help and serve.
5. Allow Ourselves to Be Served
When we allow ourselves to be influenced and changed by the people we seek to serve, we create avenues for mutual respect and, ultimately, mutual change. In the same way, allowing ourselves to be served (accepting a meal or coffee, or letting someone pray for us) is often an incredibly meaningful way to serve someone else. When we think about what it really means to live out a life of service, serving others means making space for their existence, and seeing them as valuable and worthy to serve and be served.
There is a Chinese saying that goes: “If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. And if you want happiness for a lifetime, help someone.” For centuries, the greatest thinkers have suggested that happiness is found in helping others. It is better to give than to receive. Helping others may just be the secret to living a life well. It is not only happier but also healthier, wealthier, more productive, and meaningful. Our passion is the foundation for our giving. It is not how much we give, but how much love we put into giving. The more we give, the more we stand to gain purpose, meaning and happiness.
However, even though we are willing to give more than we receive, but still, we need to keep our own interests in sight. We think about our options, and find the best charity for our values. Service isn’t a sacrifice for those who are serving others. We can use our work (or business) as a way to live a life of service. It means the main goal isn’t to make money, which is only a means to doing work that matters. Living a life of service is about waking up every day to be our best and to do our best. We can find an area that brings us joy, sense of purpose, and fulfillment. We need to look outside of ourselves, and are inspired to wake up every day to enrich our lives. All that matters is that we show up to be our best every day. It’s only when we look back at our lives and see in hindsight how we lived a life of service, we will be truly fulfilled.

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