FOMO, JOMO and beyond

The Ten Thousand Things

Moving from Fear, to Joy of Missing Out and beyond both.

FOMO arises from projection and fantasy, as does a lot of the imagined enjoyment of the imagined pleasures.

We might imagine that:

• everything we want is outside ourselves
• pleasure, meaning or peak experiences must be mediated by something: people, substances, or outside events
• that we have to follow a formula to achieve them

We chew over the classic cliche FOMO of music festivals, and unearth some insights:

• the positives of turning towards your own priorities
• pursuing projects and personal growth brings the greater contentment
• 'projects over pleasures'
• the pursuit of meaningful experiences on your own terms or with people you care about
• sometimes the best music experience is going mental to a good tune where no-one can see

Joe contends that beyond FOMO and JOMO is the flow state:

• the real peak experiences of life often occur in the flow state
• which has little to do with glamorous activities or what we have been told to want

We touch on existentialism and some key FOMO psychology:

• humans struggle to reliably imagine their own future feelings
• to weigh the influence and impact of imagined events
• we struggle to accurately assess what others put on social media, obviously
• but this is also discomfort with our own choices
• we all carry the burden of choice, of what to value and pursue
• the existential problem of assigning meaning
• it's not easy figuring out what we really want
• it's difficult to imagine what will actually make us happy or bring contentment, and in a sense it's our life's work
• the choice to engage in fulfilling projects is seemingly more difficult and uncertain than reaching for known pleasures
• the boring thing is doing what we think we will be fun and assigning it a greater future value than it can carry
• the real boredom is not always in staying home and attending to our real priorities

We harangue Joe to turn towards something he gets a lot of meaning from, passages from spiritual books, and reflect on those in a new podcast series, which leads nicely to some useful concluding thoughts

• the value of following quiet passions
• the liberation found in chosen solitude
• encouragement to make conscious life choices aligning with true desires

Episode image courtesy of Craig. Check out his new blog, it's grouse https://wish-art.blog/

Creators & Guests

• Ali Catramados - Host
• Joe Loh - Host
• Sam Ellis - Host

• (00:00) - TTTT fomo jomo
• (00:14) - Welcome and topic
• (00:33) - Personal Stories of FOMO and JOMO
• (03:20) - The Cultural Phenomenon of Music Festivals
• (05:58) - Sobriety and Its Impact on Social Life
• (07:49) - The Shift from FOMO to JOMO in Adulthood
• (07:59) - Reality, Music Festivals, It's a Business
• (08:30) - Interviews with musicians
• (19:28) - Finding Joy in Simplicity and Creativity
• (24:42) - The Real FOMO: Missing Out on Personal Passions
• (29:48) - Embracing JOMO in Everyday Life
• (31:51) - Rediscovering Simple Pleasures
• (32:13) - The Pivot: From Boredom to Texture of Experience
• (32:30) - Mediated Experiences vs. Reality
• (33:14) - Body Acceptance and the Illusion of Projected Happiness
• (34:02) - Music Festivals and the Pursuit of Authentic Joy
• (34:52) - The Path of Personal Growth
• (36:19) - Embracing Individuality and Comfort
• (48:41) - Finding Meaning in Quiet Contemplation
• (51:01) - Projects over pleasures - the origin of Joe's new podcast
• (53:43) - Joe's new diet - and more origin for the new project
• (58:53) - Balancing JOMO and FOMO
• (01:01:17) - Concluding Thoughts on Personal Fulfillment

0:00 TTTT fomo jomo
00:14 Welcome and topic
00:33 Personal Stories of FOMO and JOMO
03:20 The Cultural Phenomenon of Music Festivals
05:58 Sobriety and Its Impact on Social Life
07:49 The Shift from FOMO to JOMO in Adulthood
07:59 Reality, Music Festivals, It's a Business
08:30 Interviews with musicians
19:28 Finding Joy in Simplicity and Creativity
24:42 The Real FOMO: Missing Out on Personal Passions
29:48 Embracing JOMO in Everyday Life
31:51 Rediscovering Simple Pleasures
32:13 The Pivot: From Boredom to Texture of Experience
32:30 Mediated Experiences vs. Reality
33:14 Body Acceptance and the Illusion of Projected Happiness
34:02 Music Festivals and the Pursuit of Authentic Joy
34:52 The Path of Personal Growth
36:19 Embracing Individuality and Comfort
48:41 Finding Meaning in Quiet Contemplation
51:01 Projects over pleasures - the origin of Joe's new podcast
53:43 Joe's new diet - and more origin for the new project
58:53 Balancing JOMO and FOMO
01:01:17 Concluding Thoughts on Personal Fulfillment