Why do I have such a hard time when I tell my kids no?

Ask Dr. Julie Hanks

#Fitness #Society #Relationship #Podcasting Education #Self-Improvement #Mental Health #Dr Julie Hanks

44:09

When a young Eva Kollisch arrives as a refugee in New York in 1940, she finds a community among socialists who share her values and idealism. She soon discovers ‘the cause’ isn’t as idyllic as it seems. Little does she know this is the beginning of a lifelong commitment to activism and her determination to create radical change in ways that include belonging, love and one's full self. In addition to Eva Kollisch’s memoirs Girl in Movement (2000) and The Ground Under My Feet (2014), LBI’s collections include an oral history interview with Eva conducted in 2014 and the papers of Eva’s mother, poet Margarete Kolllisch, which document Eva’s childhood experience on the Kindertransport. Learn more at www.lbi.org/kollisch . Exile is a production of the Leo Baeck Institute , New York | Berlin and Antica Productions . It’s narrated by Mandy Patinkin. Executive Producers include Katrina Onstad, Stuart Coxe, and Bernie Blum. Senior Producer is Debbie Pacheco. Associate Producers are Hailey Choi and Emily Morantz. Research and translation by Isabella Kempf. Sound design and audio mix by Philip Wilson, with help from Cameron McIver. Theme music by Oliver Wickham. Voice acting by Natalia Bushnik. Special thanks to the Kollisch family for the use of Eva’s two memoirs, “Girl in Movement” and “The Ground Under My Feet”, the Sophia Smith Collection at Smith College and their “Voices of Feminism Oral History Project”, and Soundtrack New York.…

2年之前 16:38

MP3•单集首页

In this episode I talk with Tamee and answer the question “Why do I have such a hard time when I tell my kids no?” Tamee shares that even though she knows she isn’t responsible for making sure her children are always happy, she feels responsible whenever they have a negative response to hearing no.

Tamee grew up in a house where she felt unsafe, uncomforted, and even invisible at times. Little Tamee was driven by fear, and she may be directing the way Adult Tamee parents. We discuss how her discomfort may stem from her fear that her children will feel the way she did as a child. I invite Tamee to tell her younger self that Adult Tamee has got this. She is taking care of her children’s needs, and they know they are loved.

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.

If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks, browse DJH merch, and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.

To learn more about this topic, please see the following resource:

Reparenting Yourself course

Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.
Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.

If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.

155集单集

Why do I have such a hard time when I tell my kids no?

Ask Dr. Julie Hanks

13 subscribers

published 2年之前

MP3•单集首页

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.

To learn more about this topic, please see the following resource:

Reparenting Yourself course

155集单集

#Fitness #Society #Relationship #Podcasting Education #Self-Improvement #Mental Health #Dr Julie Hanks

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1
Differentiation of Self: The Key to Wise Decision Making Regarding the LDS Church with Valerie Hamaker Episode 34:57

25 weeks之前34:57

34:57

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1
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41 weeks之前29:43

29:43

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1
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43 weeks之前26:36

26:36

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1
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45 weeks之前30:00

30:00

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1
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48 weeks之前22:41

22:41

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1
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50 weeks之前28:19

28:19

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1
How can I better communicate to my husband that I’m not comfortable letting our child sleep at my in-laws’ house? 21:00

51 weeks之前21:00

21:00

In this episode I talk with Diana and answer the question “How can I better communicate to my husband that I’m not comfortable letting our child sleep at my in-laws’ house?” Diana is not okay with either herself or her child sleeping there because years ago, her father-in-law was arrested for child molestation. Her husband has struggled to respect this boundary. Diana and I roleplay a conversation with her husband where she holds this boundary firm. She has the right to say no to sleepovers, to trust her intuition, and to set this boundary. Her husband does not have to understand or agree for her to set this boundary, even if it makes things awkward for a time. Diana’s number one job is to keep her child safe. Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
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52 weeks之前33:34

33:34

In this episode, I chat with Christine and answer the question “How should I approach my daughter’s upcoming baptism when I don’t believe 8-year-olds are capable of making this choice?” Christine and her husband have several valid hesitations about their daughter getting baptized when they aren't sure that she really understands what she would be committing to. Christine and I unpack her concerns and I challenge the thought that her daughter has to be totally “ready” to commit to baptism before she moves forward with it. We also chat about how Christine and her husband can help their daughter develop her sense of self, how they can teach her the values that are important to them, and how they can encourage their daughter to avoid the rigid thinking that is sometimes common in the LDS Church. Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
How can I stay engaged and active in the LDS Church as a working mom and a feminist? 24:10

1 year之前24:10

24:10

In this episode I talk with Sylvia and answer the question “How can I stay engaged and active in the LDS Church as a working mom and a feminist?” Sylvia shares the story of a painful experience at Church that has left her wondering if she sustains her leaders. In fact, she has chosen not to renew her temple recommend because she isn’t sure if she can sustain her current bishopric. The word sustain has two main definitions. I used to think that sustain meant agree , but I see the word differently now. We talk about what the word actually means, and I invite Sylvia to consider what it would mean if it were okay for her to disagree with her leaders. Ultimately, we each get to decide what it means to us to sustain. Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
How do I know if I want kids because I genuinely want them or because it’s always been expected of me? 28:27

1 year之前28:27

28:27

In today’s episode, I talk with Nicole and answer the question “How do I know if I want kids because I genuinely want them or because it’s always been expected of me?” After a recent break up caused by her partner not wanting to have children, Nicole is hoping to gain some clarity as to what she wants for her future and why. Nicole and I talk about how to have a meaningful life with or without children, if it matters at the end of the day if she does want kids because it’s what she’s always assumed her future would hold, and how important it is to develop herself in every stage of life. She comes away from our conversation with a clarity on what she wants for her future—give this episode a listen to hear what she decides. Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
How can I talk about boundaries with my narcissistic mother-in-law who turns everything into my fault? 17:12

1 year之前17:12

17:12

In today’s episode I chat with Morgan and answer the question “How can I talk about boundaries with my narcissistic mother-in-law who turns everything into my fault?” Morgan describes what interactions with her mother-in-law are typically like, and from what I hear it sounds like Morgan is doing a good job interacting with her. From my perspective, the bigger problem is between Morgan and her husband. There are important conversations Morgan and her husband need to have regarding boundaries and his family. Until she and her husband have basic agreements about what is appropriate to say or do when it comes to his family, there’s not a lot Morgan can do except distance herself from her mother-in-law to avoid being hurt. Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
How do I learn to trust myself when I feel a disconnect between what I learn in therapy and what I hear at Church? 24:59

1 year之前24:59

24:59

In today’s episode, I talk with Kelly and answer the question “How do I learn to trust myself when I feel a disconnect between what I learn in therapy and what I hear at Church?” I know that a lot of listeners are going to relate to our discussion. Kelly shares that she feels two parts of her life—therapy and the Church—have been influential and helpful, but that they are currently at odds. During our time together we talk about Fowler’s Stages of Faith and how Kelly is moving from trusting external authority (sources like Church leaders or teachers) to trusting internal authority (trusting herself to know what is best for her life). It’s confusing to have conflicting messages from two important things in your life, and it takes practice to sort through these feelings. I invite Kelly to give herself grace as she learns how to trust herself and reframe her thinking. Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
How can I be present when grief is always reminding me of what could have been? 43:23

1 year之前43:23

43:23

Listen as I talk with Jennifer and answer the question “How can I be present when grief is always reminding me of what could have been?“ Jennifer shares the story of her relationship, her husband’s cancer diagnosis, and her experience of being a new mom of twins while navigating the grief of losing her husband. Now, five years later, she feels split between being present in her daily life and grieving the life she didn’t get to live with her late husband. Jennifer and I talk more about what it really means to be present in her life. She describes the cloud she feels hanging over her, reminding her of what could have been. We discuss how accepting that her family looks different doesn’t dishonor her late husband—it can help her find more peace with her current reality. You can find Jennifer on Instagram @ cocoscaravan Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
Bonus Episode: How to Stay Connected to the LDS Church in a Psychologically Healthy Way with Valerie Hamaker 56:40

1 year之前56:40

56:40

This bonus episode of the podcast is for anyone who is wanting to stay in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints while also protecting their mental health. Listen as fellow LDS therapist Valerie Hamaker and I share insight on important topics like why people choose to stay in the LDS Church after a faith transition and how to develop the crucial skill of setting boundaries. Choosing to Stay? How to Stay Connected to the LDS Church in a Psychologically Healthy Way If you choose to stay and want to protect your mental health, Valerie and I are hosting a discussion series just for you. This 4-week Q&A discussion series will help you find clarity, set boundaries, and stay connected to the LDS Church in a psychologically healthy way. Bring your questions about your complex relationship with the Church, including: Difficult family relationships Trust crisis about Church history & doctrine Feelings of betrayal Struggles with social justice issues (women, BIPOC, LGBTQ) Benefits of Church participation Each two-hour session is held remotely via Zoom. Spots are extremely limited, so don’t wait to sign up. Four two-hour sessions with two therapists is an absolute steal of a deal. While this series is valued at $2,000, you can sign up today for only $169. Choosing to stay in the Church but want to do it in a psychologically healthy way? Let us help you.⁠ Secure your spot (limited availability) today Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session. Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review . And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify . If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses . Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com . For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com .…

1
Has my Latter-day Saint upbringing impacted my sexuality? 22:04

1 year之前22:04