[I Thirst] Day 36 – A Hardened Heart

Farmer of Hearts - Finding God in All Things

"Feeling thirsty" is a state of being "unsatisfied", a state of "waiting", and a "signal" to us to take action to quench our thirst. No matter how difficult the action may be, it is something within our control, something we can take initiative and act on to relieve our “thirst”. For example, if our desire is to increase our savings , we can work hard to earn money or cut expenses so that we can have more savings. These are results that we can obtain through our efforts and proactive action.

On the contrary, God's desires are not many, in fact, He has only one primary desire, which is that we freely choose to love Him. God is thirsting for our thirst for Him! Because He loves us, He has given us the freedom to choose, making God the passive party. He keeps waiting and waiting, until we respond! Imagine you are waiting and longing for someone who is not waiting and longing for you, or you have fallen in love with someone who doesn't love you. How painful and torturous that is!

We have all experienced the anticipation of a long-awaited holiday, a dream vacation, or the reunion of family and friends. That kind of waiting is joyful, rather than painful, and it even enhances the excitement of the anticipation, allowing us to have a foretaste of the sweetness of that happy day. But our Heavenly Father does not have this privilege! His waiting is bitter, like an indefinite sentence, and it will very likely be in vain! That pain is even more unbearable than death! If God were willing to give up on us, He would not have to endure this heart-wrenching agony forever! But He hasn't! He would never give up on us, and He has chosen to wait...

God has given us everything He can out of His love for us, to the point where He gets Himself into real trouble. The deeper His love and the higher His expectations for us, our indifference and even cruelty towards Him are more like swords that pierced His Heart.

This is not just a human lover who is madly in love with us. This is God the Almighty who loves us to the point of subjecting Himself to us, His own creation and beloved mankind, to be betrayed and cruelly whipped and beaten, shamelessly mocked and insulted, and… at the end, allowing us, using the most brutal and humiliating way, to strip of His clothes, piece by piece,... stripped totally of His dignity… This majestic Creator, King, Master, and Saviour, whom we should bow down to, was stripped naked before us, allowing Himself to be nailed to the Cross and died for us, and died on the cross. This is our choice, the price God paid for His love for us. Oh my soul, what kind of reasoning is this!

Unfortunately, our hearts are so hardened that we do not have the slightest compassion for our Saviour. We simply watch our Heavenly Father, who loves us to such an extreme extent, wait for us in agony, and we continue our own ways, giving Him cold shoulders heartlessly. We even have the audacity to complain about God not treating us well. When will this hardness of heart end? My soul, what has God done wrong to you? Where is your conscience?

Today’s Prayer

Abba Father, standing before You, facing my hardened heart, I am truly speechless... Why have I allowed myself to come to this point? I really don't know. Perhaps it's my selfishness, my lack of compassion, or maybe I truly don't know You, don't understand Your love for me, and don't realize that You are willing to do anything for me…

Heavenly Father, please grant me a bit more courage to face my own ugliness, to face Your silent gaze, and to respond to Your thirst for me... please, make me a repentant prodigal child and put me on my journey back to You!

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The following is the “Farmer of Hearts: I Thirst” team, including FLL staff and volunteers.
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